A Word In The Bar
by KarmicRuffia
Summary: Akuroku. It should have been a normal night, working in his brother's bar. Why then, was the blonde singer on the stage so interesting? Two shot.
1. Chapter 1

The boy on the stage was ethereal, angelic. Blond hair covered his face, spiking up to the left- my left, his right. Blue orbs shone out to the crowd, a piercing gaze that seemed to light up the room and rest on everyone in it. He wasn't smiling, but I wanted him to- wanted that so much, in that moment. I wanted it to be _me _brightening that face with a grin, a laugh, a smile.

He didn't look old at all- only sixteen or seventeen- but to be let into this bar he had to at least eighteen, and I knew that the bouncer was the best at spotting fake IDs. Rude was like that, silent and strong, but one of the smartest people I knew- Reno wouldn't have hired him otherwise. The kid was probably fresh out of high school, trying to garner some cash for college with his beat-up guitar and that _voice_.

It wasn't as if I'd never heard a good singing voice before. Heck, I'd heard _better_, plenty of times. But those had all been highly edited big-time singers on new digitalised mp3 tracks, in high definition and with a heavy bass drowning out anything that wasn't good. Half the time, if you listened to a live act of theirs, it sounded as if was a completely different person. This kid had none of that. He was singing in a smoky and outdated club on the wrong side of town, over top of the sounds of beer guzzling and someone throwing up in the ladies toilets. His guitar was barely audible and the microphone kept crapping out on him. Yet I still wanted to hear that voice everyday, every minute, every second.

There was no innocence left in his face. He looked beaten, like there had been nothing good in his life so far, and I could see that he'd been burned once or twice in his life.

_Girl or guy? _

Was it too much to hope that he was attracted to men? More specifically, men like me? The way I see it, it's always to much to hope when it comes to sexuality. God, for all I knew he was a homophobe, although why a homophobe would decide to work in _Reno's _bar I had no idea. Perhaps he didn't know- but then again, it's not like Reno ever went to lengths to disguise his doings and the comings and goings of his sexual partners. Girls, guys, Reno wasn't picky- and god knows how many times I'd caught them creeping out at obscene hours. When that happened, normally I gave them a couple of aspirin to help with the inevitable hangover, and usually collected their names and numbers on the off chance that Reno remembered them in the morning.

I wiped the bar off with a bluish cloth and some weird cleaning liquid that Reno had picked up from the dollar store the other day. It smelled kind of like sweat mixed with spearmint and sulphuric acid, and so I made a mental note to avoid it next time. It cleaned up okay, I guess, but it would definitely put off the customers, no matter how drunk they were.

It was that time of night, when I had to start refusing people drinks and kicking out the bawdier ones that seemed to think the middle of the dance floor was the best place to start a fight. The kid's set was over and some sort of techno crap was playing over the speakers, leaving only the drunkest of patrons to slump on the floor and doze, as the rest were to busy trying to dance until they upchucked on the wooden floor. I could tell already that tonight wasn't going to be pretty, and I hoped that we still had some of the extra-strength cleaner left in the cupboard.

I heard someone clear their throat behind me. "_Ahem_."

I turned around, barely turning a hair as I saw the kid sitting there , scowl permanently etched on his face. "Hey, kid," I said with a smirk. "Nice set you had there. What'll it be?"

If it was possible to scowl even more than he already was, he did it. "Beer, thanks. And don't call me 'kid'."

"Are you sure you want a beer? You seem a little young for that. How about kiddie liquor? That seems more up your alley..." I trailed away, already snatching a glass from the cabinet.

"Enough with the kid jokes already! Jesus fucking Christ, I'm twenty!"

I looked over at him doubtfully. This one I really did not believe. I'm a bartender, I've heard my share of _"I swear I'm legal," _and _"look, it's real! That is my real ID!", _especially the time I was filling in for Rude the night after he hooked up with Reno. But this one... I got that he was legal, and I was just joking about the kiddie liquor, but I had him pegged for a young eighteen, not twenty. Twenty was pushing it.

"Sure, kid," I said, turning back to my cleaning after pushing his drink towards him. "Pull the other one."

He growled and shoved his ID towards me. "Take a look, then."

I pulled it towards me, more curious than any bartender worth his salt should be.

_Roxas Strife_, it said in official black letters. _DOB: 13/8/92._

"Rude passed this?" I said, incredulously. "This is legit?"

"_Yes_," he said. "For fuck's sake. _I'm telling the truth_!"

"Yeah, yeah, babycakes. Nice name, by the way. Haven't heard that one before."

"It's a family name," he grumbled. "On my mother's side. What's your's, then? You know mine, it's only fair. And stop with the weird nicknames, it's getting on my nerves."

I picked up a few glasses and wiped them, getting another customer a Jack Daniels and walking back to Blondie- Roxas. "Name's Axel. A-X-E-L. Got it memorised?"

"Axel, huh? Sounds about as fake as that hair of yours."

I raised my hand protectively to my halo of bright red spikes. "That's 'cause it is. All natural, Blondie-"

"_Roxas_."

"-Roxy. No shit."

He snorted. "You've gotta be kidding me. That is the fakest hair colour I've seen in my life. And my brother's boyfriend's hair is fucking _silver_."

I smiled. Not a homophobe, then. "I'm telling you, Roxy, it's all natural. I can prove it, too." I lifted the edge of my shirt slightly. His eyes widened and he flapped his hand furiously at me. "Jeez, okay! I get it, it's natural! You don't have to bloody _strip_!"

I grinned, letting go of the cloth. "Glad we could straighten that out, then. If you really want proof, though, my brother got cursed with it too. Reno, ya know? You met him, I'm sure. Yup, this is as natural as it comes."

"Glad to know. Can I get another?" He waved his empty glass at me, and I grabbed it out of his hands, silently refilling it. "Don't drink too much, Blondie. You might have to sleep it off here, and we don't want that, do we?"

"I'm not going to- for Christ's sake! Why does everyone assume that because I look like I'm twelve I'm a fucking lightweight? It's only my second one! I'm twenty, goddamnit! I should be able to get a goddamn drink without every man and his dog getting up in my face for every bloody drink I have! Jesus Christ! Lord knows when this will fucking stop and I've had it up to here! Goddamn. God fucking damn."

I stared at him. "That was a lot of swearing and blasphemy for one pint-size, Blondie. I hope you're not religious, because I have an inkling that The Lord Above is not going to like that."

"Shut your goddamn mouth," he said stonily, looking into his drink. He swallowed it in a couple of gulps, and I rolled my eyes, reminding myself to watch out for him later. I had a feeling that this wasn't going to stop there.

"_Axel_!" my brother yelled from the other side of the room. "Get your ass over here, stat, yo! We've got a live one!"

I sighed, walking out of the bar space and leaving it to our other bartender, Luxord, to serve to rest of the drunken rabble that were now congregating around the shiny surface while I went to clear out the first fight of the night.

The two that had gotten into it this time were a piratical looking dude with a white streak through his otherwise jet-black hair and a nasty looking scar that ran down his cheek, and a guy with dreadlocks and the ugliest sideburns I had ever seen. One had pulled out a knife, the other a gun, and they were about to go at it when my brother had gotten involved. He was holding down the pirate with the gun, who was obviously the bigger threat, but at the same time having to dodge the knife guy, who was determined to hack the pirate into tiny bloody pieces.

"Axel! Help me out here, yo. This is a _big _problem, 'cause it looks like they've got followers."

I looked around, and sure enough there was a group surrounding the two- a group that I recognised. "Xemnas," I said coldly as I pulled Sideburns away. "What are you doing here?"

The white-haired man stared down at me coldly. "If it isn't Axel Flurry," he said scathingly. "The one that got away,"

I gulped, now recognising the two Reno and I had restrained. Xigbar and Xaldin, Xemnas's lieutenants- the Freeshooter and the Whirlwind. They were dangerous to the point of death, and I was seriously wishing I'd stayed over at the bar with Roxas and sent Luxord to deal with this.

I couldn't believe I didn't recognise them. It had been three years, yes, but who could forget a face like that? Either of them could fit the description of _'tall, dark, and so ugly it burns'_. It bruised my bartender's ego- _never forget a face_- and for a moment I was so shocked that I almost let go of Xaldin.

"Hey, Axel, yo," my brother said. "Catch-up later, okay? First let's get these guys-" he pressed his foot into Xigbar's back- "outta here." He kicked Xigbar out of the door, and I chucked Xaldin out after him. "And don't come back," I yelled, "got it memorised?"

I turned to Xemnas, sporting a scowl that could've rivalled Blondie's. "I believe I asked you a question, fuckface. _What are you doing here?_"

He laughed. "That's rich coming from you. If I remember correctly, you were the one poking your nose where it doesn't belong, Axel. I remember, you see." He strode around to the bar, going in behind the counter. "This is a nice setup you got here, Axel. It'd be such a shame if it all... disappeared."

"What the hell do you think you're doing, asshole? Get out from behind the bar."

"I own this town, Axel. Always have, always will. You've been given a break, a way out from your past... Don't waste it on petty grudges with the like of me. For all you know, you could end up back there, on the accused's stand... Only this time you won't get off scot-free like you did."

I laughed. "You've got to be kidding. You're threatening me? With _jail_? News flash, buddy. They don't listen to you, not anymore. Mayor Xehanort is dead, and the new one you don't have twisted around your little finger. They've been looking for you for the past three years, ever since that kid you hooked up ended up in a coma. I'm surprised you even showed your face around here, like you didn't know that someone was going to call the cops."

His smile didn't falter. "Where are your precious cops, Axel? Are they here? I don't think so. I don't think they're coming, you see. I think I have just as much influence in this town as I did before Xehanort's demise. I think you're bluffing."

"You know what_ I _think, dumbass? I think you stole my line. Because that's just what you're doing, you know. Bluffing."

His eyes narrowed. "You'll regret this, you know. If they get me- well, lets just say that you were there that night too."

I smirked. "I thought you said that they weren't going to come for you? Or did I hear that part wrong?"

He scowled at me, and whirled off in a huff. I turned back the the rest of the Organisation, who made rude hand gestures and mouthed bad words at me. But there wasn't much they could do; after all, without their leader they were nothing, and I had effectively shut their leader down. I gestured to the group with my head to Luxord, and said in an undertone, "can you please tell Rude not to let those guys back in again?"

He raised an eyebrow. "You're gonna go up against the Organisation? Axel, that's bloody nuts! They'll crucify you! You know that as well as I do- and you know they'll tell, like Xemnas said. And you know that I'm just as guilty as you are, Axel, so when you're off flipping them the bird and pissing them off, you'd better bloody well remember to keep me out of this." He picked up the cleaner that I had been using earlier and made like he was going to clean the counter, but I knew better.

"Luxord, put that down, you know that's not going to work. I did that earlier, anyway. Will you just kick them out? Please?"

He sighed, and put down the cloth. "If we go to jail, I'm blaming bloody everything on you."

"Likewise," I said, smiling as I went to serve some rich bitch brunette a cosmopolitan. "Hey, honey," I said smoothly. "Bit late for you, isn't it?"

She looked me in the eye. "Cut the crap, Axel. You and I both know you're not a... girl person, shall we say, and I'm not a boy person."

I reeled. "Larxene, what... You dyed your hair! Wait- you bat for the other team?"

She rolled her eyes. "Never were the smartest, were you? But that's not the point. You just kicked my very good friends out of this hovel, and I don't think that's the way to build a business relationship- a relationship you sorely need. Look at this place, Axe- it's falling down around your ears! You need money, moolah, whatever you want to call it, and Axel, honey- I need you. Think of how great the Organisation could be, with us at the head! The power, the fame... And of course, the business, the money. I think we could have a very good business relationship, Axel, I really think we could. So... What do you say?"

I didn't know what I would have said to her. Larxene had this thing, this _pizzaz_ that could have so easily swayed me to accept her offer. She was charismatic, altruistic, and this was problematic- I couldn't say no, not to her. She _listened _when you talked, appearing for all the world as if all she wanted to do was help, and then _bam_! She'd managed to wrangle home and hearth out of you.

I guess it was lucky it wasn't me that answered.

"That's bull, yo. Ya think you can get your grubby little hands on _my _bar and _my _brother? Lady, I don't care how pretty you are, you got another think comin'. He ain't got the rights to make a deal like that anyway, yo- only I can, an' I say that that's complete bullshit! Do you believe your own words? 'Cause believe mine, _honey- _you ain't ever coming near this town again. You think you got connections? Lady, I've got _all _the connections here."

She swiveled around on her seat. "Reno, how nice it is to see you again."

"Your definition of _nice_ and mine are very different, Larxene, very different." He stepped closer to us, and I breathed a silent sigh of relief that I was behind the bar counter. It was a very good place to be in that moment. "In fact, Larxene, why don't you stop trying to seduce my brother- oh, don't give me that face, it's the same thing- and get the fuck out of here?"

"It's a free country."

"Not in my bar, it isn't. Are you going to leave, or shall I get Rude to kick you out?"

She got up daintily, evidently not enamoured with the idea of Rude touching any part of her. To be honest, I wouldn't be, either- Rude's as big as a tank, and about as eloquent and gentle as one, too.

"So, the Organisation, huh?" said a voice behind me. I turned away, missing the chance to see Larxene storm off in a strop, and saw that it was Roxas, who was still nursing a beer.

"Blondie," I grinned. "You missed me!"

"I should be angrier, you know. That you were with them. They messed up my brother pretty bad, once. But I'm not. I don't know why."

"Do you want to talk about it?" I asked, playing the role of sympathetic barkeep.

"Not really. Sora's... Well, he's okay now, and there's no point in opening old wounds. But, I dunno... It just seems wrong. That I'm not angry at you for it."

"Get angry at me, then. Roxas, we met two hours ago, and we're probably never going to see each other after this night." _No matter how much I would like that,_ I added silently.

"I can't. I've been angry for so long... I punched Riku in the face, you know, when I heard that Sora was in hospital. I blamed him for everything."

"Riku?"

"Sora's boyfriend."

"Oh." I started cleaning glasses. My shift was almost over, and I could soon let Reno take over for the night. Until then... well, there are worse people to talk to than Blondie.

"I knew you were an ass, when I first saw you. How could you not be? You're just so gorgeous, and cute-"

"Whoa, _hold the phone_, Blondie. I'm not _cute, _got it memorised? I'm manly, yes. Gorgeous, yes- you get points for that one. You can call me beautiful, I won't complain. But _cute_? Fucking _cute_? I'm not cute, Blondie. I am a _manly man_. We _manly men_ are not _cute_. How many drinks have you had?"

He looked up at me with malice in his eyes. "That's not the point, Red."

"Red?!"

"You call me Blondie, I call you Red. Do unto others, blah blah blah. But the thing is- it doesn't surprise me anymore, hot guys being assholes. It's just a fact of my life. Hot guys are assholes. Nice guys are straight. Hot gay nice guys are taken by hot gay assholes."

"C'est la vie, I guess."

"Yeah. I guess. But you... I knew it. I think I already said that. But that's it. As soon as I saw you, I knew it would happen. I would fucking fall in love with you and you would fucking break my fucking heart. I just didn't expect it to happen so goddamn soon."

"Jesus, Blondie. Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?"

"I don't think you get the point of this, Axel. _I can't get angry at you_. You were part of the gang that caused my brother to be in a coma for eight fucking months, and I'm _not angry_."

I looked down at the patch of counter that I'd wiped. "That kid was your brother, huh?"

His eyes snapped up to mine. "You were there?"

I sighed, wishing I didn't have to go into this with Blondie. "Yeah. Yeah, I was."

"Well?"

"It was a shit of a party, ya know? Booze, girls, guys... The whole shebang. We were wasted, off our faces. I can't remember that much from it. I do remember your brother, though. Brown hair? Blue eyes like fucking searchlights? Yeah. Couldn't forget his face.

"He was pretty, I guess, if you're into the whole innocence thing. He'd hung out with us a couple of times before, and he never _got _anything, none of the jokes or innuendos. I didn't like him at all in _that_ way, he was just like a kid brother. One that you got shitfaced with.

"That night Vexen kept giving him more to drink, and the kid... Sora... he just went along with it. And the next morning he was gone, and Xemnas was telling us we had to go, leave, before the cops got there. Xehanort had just kicked the bucket, and the police were cracking down... and then out of the blue, the kid had gone and crashed his car, and it was all our fault. I couldn't stand that guilt... I had to get out of there. I stood up to Xemnas, and got the shit knocked out of me by his guard dogs.

"Reno gave me a job, afterwards. And I guess I just thought that I'd never have to face that part of my life again. I was wrong. _It _was wrong. The whole thing was just so fucked up."

He looked into his cup, nodding. "Yeah, well, it was even more fucked up on my end, believe me. My brother was in hospital for with months, not able to wake up or do anything... And I wanted you dead. I didn't even know who you were, and I wanted you dead, you and your friends."

"You're talkative when you're drunk, you know that, Blondie?"

"I ask myself why I'm not angry with you, and you know what my brain comes up with? I'm _attracted_ to you. You're _attractive_. I'm- you need to stop being attractive. Right now. Go."

"Blondie, the world doesn't work that way."

He rolled his eyes at me, and grabbed the front of my shirt, pulling me down to face level. "Maybe if I do this, it'll go away."

He covered my lips with his, and I could suddenly taste beer and something else- oranges, maybe, or perhaps lemons. There wasn't as much alcohol as I thought there was, and I smiled against his lips as I began to kiss back. "Blondie. You're not drunk."

"Never said I was, did I?" He smirked, and pulled me closer to him. It caught me by surprise, how strong Roxas was, and I let out a gasp into his mouth. In response, he thrust his tongue into _my_ mouth and I moaned, a reflex response. He was dominating the kiss, and I was just standing there behind the bar, my movements limited by the slab between us. I broke the kiss, and whispered, "I'll just go sign out."

I did that as quick as I could, hastily shoving my time card in the slot so hard that it crumpled. I ran back out, and Blondie was still there, waiting for me; for some reason this surprised me. I had expected him to run off, but this... it was encouraging. I went back over to him and leaned down. "Now... Where were we?"

He rolled his eyes again- he was exceptionally good at doing that- and crushed our lips together. I lifted him up against me, and he wrapped his legs around my waist as he nibbled on my lip. I captured his mouth once more, and this time I explored _his _mouth, feeling a tingle in my stomach erupt as he moaned. He tugged on my hair- _god, it feels so good_- and I gasped out his name, his proper one. Roxas, not Blondie, or Roxy, or kid. In that moment he was Roxas.

He broke contact and looked into my eyes. "Your place or mine?" he asked roughly.

"Where do you live?"

"Hickory Street."

"That's too far away. Mine." I pulled him out the door and into my car, occasionally pulling him over to me and kissing him as hard as I could. In the car, it was all I could do not to molest him right there, but in my opinion, cars aren't made for that sort of thing. Especially not my rust bucket, which at least started on the first go this time; although it did rattle its way uncomfortably to my apartments in double the time a normal car would take.

"Your car is horrible, Axel," said Roxas, getting out and slamming the door behind him. "How can you stand it?"

"I'm on a barkeep's salary, Roxas, I can't afford better."

"Why are you a barkeeper, then? Why didn't you go to college, or something like that? You're smart, Axel, I can tell that already."

"Money's tight. I can't afford the tuition, and anyway, I doubt I would get into any college worth going to. My school scores in my senior year were shit, I was hanging out with the Organisation... I have a bad record."

"So retake the exams. Try and get yourself a scholarship, maybe. Student loans are available as well, Axel, and you can get a day job, maybe. I can't dictate what you do, but just... think about it, really."

"I don't know, Blondie, I really don't. Just... leave it, alright?"

"Yeah, alright," he said, pulling open the door to my apartment and tugging me in behind him by my shirt. We ended up tumbled on my kitchen floor, kissing as if our lives depended on it. "Not here," I gasped out as he bit down on my neck, kissing across my jaw. "Fuck, Roxas... not here."

We barely made it to the bedroom.

* * *

The next morning he was gone. I don't know if I had expected him to stay or not, but it still hurt to see the empty spot on the bed where his head had been last night. He had been... amazing. For a midget, he was surprisingly rough, although with what he'd been through I wasn't surprised.

I looked up at the ceiling, running my fingers through my hair. The red strands were still tangled, and I remembered the feeling of Roxas's hands, toying with them, knotting them; I sighed. If it wasn't totally unhygienic I would probably never wash it again, just to remember that. It was sappy, and so unlike me that I almost couldn't believe it myself, but it was true. Sometime during the night, I had fallen in love with Blondie.

I don't believe in love at first sight. It's a sham, a construct to leech money out of lovesick saps, mostly by bar owners like Reno, and jewellery and candy store owners. They'll buy you a drink, buy you necklaces and chocolates, and then _boom_! They'll fall out of love just as easily. It's not even love, it's lust, and guys thinking with their dicks. They're not looking for a life together, but a quick lay in the car, or in the bar restrooms.

That was not what I was feeling. It wasn't that I wanted to shag him again, but that I wanted to just _see_ him. See his face one more time, just once. I wanted to see him smile, I wanted to hear him laugh. I didn't know why I wanted that from a guy I hadn't known for more than a few hours, but I did.

It wasn't fate. I don't believe in fate either. You make your bed, you lie in it, is my philosophy in life, which is why I worked at Reno's bar. But Roxas... for Roxas I'd believe in anything, even something as wholly unreasonable as destiny.

I got up carefully, moving my clothing out of the way. Blondie's stuff was gone- I had guessed that it would be. My stuff, however, was still strewn around the house where he'd flung it off, and I walked through picking it up. Some of it still smelled like Blondie, and I stuck that in the washing, not wanting to dwell on him. I knew I would never see him again, it was inevitable; all I knew about him was that he was twenty, and lived on Hickory Street, which wasn't exactly a small place. Trying to find him would be like looking for needle in a haystack; no, even worse. A piece of hay in a needlestack- if I tried, I would get hurt.

There was a note on the kitchen table when I got out there, a little piece of white paper that hadn't been there the night before. It was folded neatly in two, resting precariously on the edge, and I eagerly snatched it up.

_Sorry_, it said. Just the one word. _Sorry_.

I think that's when I decided to sort my crappy life out.

* * *

Back then, I was making deals with God, things like, _if I pass the college exam I'll see Roxas again _and _if I turn my life around he'll give me a chance._ I blamed my dead-end life for him leaving, like if I'd had a purpose in life he would have stayed. It was bull, I knew that deep inside, but I was desperate. After Blondie, it felt as if I'd become a bit asexual- I couldn't imagine doing it with other guys, or girls for that matter. It was always Blondie, as if he'd just taken over my life. Sometimes I felt like those really rubbish romance novels that my mother used to read, the ones about girls who had seen their perfect guys in dreams or guys that had fallen in love with a girl at first sight in the woods.

I took the exam, and actually scored fairly high, high enough to get a partial scholarship for chemistry. It was at Hollow Bastion College, which wasn't too far away, and I was working with this guy Ienzo, who reminded me of my old friend, Zexion. Zexion had died in a police raid back in the Organisation, one of the only raids there ever was there. Later, I found out that Ienzo and Zexion had been identical twins, and it felt sort of special- like I'd gained my old friend back. They were both the same, taciturn and reserved, with slate hair and a bored expression.

Soon enough, a pyrotechnics company picked me up, paid the rest of my college fees. In four years, after I'd finished, I was going to work there, but first I had to actually finish my schooling.

[PAGEBREAK]

I downed the orange juice I was holding, watching my brother suck face with Rude. It was a disgusting sight, one that I hoped was not going to be a regular thing. God, I missed alcohol, but I'd sworn off it for a bit, until I got my head sorted out.

It wasn't even the afternoon yet, and the two were about to get it on in the middle of my lounge.

"Is now really the time?" I asked, wrinkling my nose as my brother made a sound that I hoped never to hear again. Neither answered me, and I raised my voice. "OI! You two! That's repulsive, got it memorised? Knock it off!"

"Shut the fuck up and get your own fuck buddy, Axel, yo," muttered Reno, "and get the hell out of here."

I narrowed my eyes and got up angrily. "Fine. I want you out of my apartment by noon. And clean up any mess you make, _please._ Oh, and make sure you aren't seen, I don't want Mr Salisbury from next door traumatised. You look a lot like me, Reno, got it memorised?"

"Shut up and go way, yo. Shut up and go the hell away."

I rolled my eyes and strode out into the hallway of the apartment building. It was a crappy place, and whoever built it had no taste at all. The carpet was at least fifty years old and the paintwork even older; the stairs were a death trap and the only reason the elevator worked was because Gregory Smith on the third floor was an engineer.

Everything was a shade of puke-green.

I pressed the button for the ground floor, and then shivered and pulled my beanie around my ears. It was winter in Twilight Town and freezing cold, with snow threatening any minute. I wore the thickest coat I had, yet the wind seemed to eat its way through the fabric like a hungry beast, devouring warmth like it was sea-salt ice cream.

The elevator dinged, and I walked out.

I had my laptop with me, and a class in an hour that I could study for. There was a library a five minute walk away, and three inches of snow, so I had a choice between a warm place to study and the chatter of a million students, or peace and solitude and frostbite. I was used to noise, so I headed for the library; perhaps I could find a book to read as well.

I wasn't looking in front of me, opting instead to watch the footpath in front of me. I kicked snow out of my way, curling my lip in distaste at the muddy brown slush that covered every surface, getting in to the cracks and crevices and up people's pants, which was one of my pet peeves when it came to snow.

I don't like snow. I don't like the cold, the wet, or the rainy. I don't like water, or anything affiliated with it; I never even learned to swim. I don't mind, because I don't ever plan on going anywhere that would require that knowledge, which was why Reno's bar was such a great place for me. Alcohol and a dead end job nowhere near the water; how could life get any better?

I wanted more out of my life now, thanks to Blondie. A job, a proper house... maybe even adopt some kids sometime, in the future. I couldn't imagine myself with a husband, though. Hell, if I thought about it, I couldn't even see myself with Blondie, anymore. I was doomed to spent life as a crazy cat man.

I saw a store out of the corner of my eye. It was fairly new, with black and white gothic lettering spanning the slightly grubby windows. It looked reputable enough, and not too dear, and the designs in the windows didn't look as commercialised as ones in the other shops I'd seen.

_Keyblade Tattoo Parlour_, it was called.

I walked in, smelling the musty air. It didn't look like anyone ever went in there, which was not reassuring, and I was about to turn around and walk back out when a guy came out of the back room, drying his hands with a green cloth. "You here for a tat?" he asked without any real interest.

He had bright orange hair- not dyed, pure natural ginger. There wasn't an inch of his skin that I could see that didn't have a tattoo on it, but he was skinny and not threatening and he didn't have any piercings, and he had black glasses with chunky frames. He seemed to be in a perpetual state of apathy, and my first though was that I didn't want this man to ever put needles anywhere near my skin.

I nodded, though, as if against my will. I didn't know what it was I wanted, and I didn't know why I'd come into this dimly lit, hole-in-the-wall shop. It had seemed fine on the outside, but on the inside... I don't know why you'd waste the time keeping up the outside but not the interior. It seemed pretty stupid to me.

"I don't know," I said, though I was still nodding slightly. "It may have been a mistake, to come in here."

He opened his mouth to speak, but I stopped him. "And if you tell me that it's fate's will that I'm here, or some other hippie shit, I will walk out that door before you can say '_destiny_'."

He raised an eyebrow. "There's no such thing as fate, unless you believe in it. There's no point otherwise. No, I don't believe fate brought you here. I was just thinking..." He grabbed my face, jerked it up and down.

"Do you _mind?_" I mumbled, his hands squeezing my cheeks together so I couldn't talk properly.

"Sorry..." he said, picking up a felt tip marker. "Can I?"

I rolled my eyes. "Sure."

He started scribbling on my face, which I did not expect. The fumes from the marker were horrible, and the feel of it on my skin- it was a slimy kind, and old. But soon it was over, and he turned me around to face a full-length mirror that I guess was to show people their tattoos in, and I saw it.

It was perfect. Two triangles under my eyes, bringing out the acid green in them that I'd inherited from my mother. They were like teardrops, and they made my face look thinner, and I just looked... older. More dangerous.

I needed it, as soon as I saw it. And I knew it was something that no one else in the business could do right for me.

"Yes," I said immediately, turning to the guy. "That's it. That's the one."

"Are you sure? Do you want to think about it? It's gonna hurt, you know..."

I looked back at it. I was rash, but I knew if I didn't do it know I'd lose the nerve. "Yeah. Now. Pronto."

He shrugged, leading me over to a cracked leather chair. "How old are you?"

"Twenty-three."

"Okay. I'll give it to you half price, 'cause you're young and you're obviously a student. Wait a second, I'll just go get the needles."

It hurt like a bitch, with the needle going in and out of my skin, imprinting the ink forever on my skin. Why had I gotten tattoos on my face? It was a stupid idea. It didn't take that long- although I suppose it wasn't a very complicated design. When it was done, he put a sort of salve on it, covered it up with a bandagy thing, charged me, and sent me out the door; I reached up, but didn't touch it. I didn't even want to know.

Instead of going to the library like I was going to, I went back home. I wanted to wait for the pain to settle a little, and I didn't know if it was okay to touch it or not. My class was very soon, by then, and I just couldn't go. I hoped fervently that Reno and Rude were done; god, that would be an awkward conversation if they weren't and with Reno's shamelessness, it would be a very detailed one too, which was the opposite of what I needed right then.

The white landscape kind of saddened me, for some reason. Sighing, I walked into my apartment building and trudged up the stairs, thinking that while for once my life was on track, but yet it sucked all the same.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I own many things, but Kingdom Hearts is not one of them.**

The club was disreputable, smoky, and stank of booze and vomit. The microphone I was singing into was a piece of shit, my spiky blond hair was sticking to my face, and my guitar was making funny screeching noises.

And the hot red headed bartender wouldn't stop fucking _staring _at me.

Straight away, I knew the guy was an ass. His whole demeanour demanded it- head cocked to the side, smirk in place on his slightly angular face, walking as if he owned the place. He would serve a customer and then resume looking at me, corner of his smile twitching up whenever I looked back. It would have been creepy if he looked like a stalkerish person, but instead it just drew me in, inviting me. He was just _sex_, sex on legs. He was a walking advertisement for promiscuity.

I wondered what he thought when he looked at me. Did he see the bags under my eyes, the tiredness that cracked my voice and put a slump in my shoulders? Did he see the sorrow that brought me down? The anger that fuelled me? Did he see confusion that permeated this, that oozed through and left me standing there alone?

I sincerely doubted it.

His hair was a wild array of red spikes, a halo around his otherwise devilish face. It looked like it had a mind of its own, as if it was a bed of snakes slithering and hissing, fiery demons that tricked and pranced and stuck out obnoxiously from his head. It was magnificent, and straight away I could imagine my hands tangled in it, tugging and twisting as I kissed him until both of us were breathless. I sat there with my guitar on my knee, singing about life, love, and inescapable immaturity, and tried very hard not to stare outright at that hair, lest I molest him right there in the middle of my set.

His eyes, too, deserved a monologue. They were the exact green of my mother's favourite dish washing liquid, and seemed to have the same iridescent quality as well, shining and shimmering, seeming to come in tides and waves. The edges were ringed in smoky black eyeliner, the first sign of a gay man, which comforted me greatly in my fantasy. If all self-control failed, at least I wouldn't be molesting a straight man.

He was skinny, with the most womanly hips I have ever seen on a guy. It didn't make him look any less masculine, though, not like it should've, which I thought was extremely unfair. _If I had hips like that, _I mused, _I would look like fucking Naminé._

Thinking of my little sister, I cringed. If she had been there, straight away she would have told me to stay away from the redhead. She would have physically stopped me from associating in any way with the guy. At that point, I really needed Naminé.

When my set finished, I got ready to creep out the door and back home, where Nami and Sora were waiting for me to get back. The guy who'd employed me, though, Reno, stopped me. "Here's your money, yo," he said with a smile. "If you stay for a bit, the drinks are on the house. Wait- you're old enough, right? 'Cause no offence, but you look fifteen, yo. I don't want to get nabbed for serving you alcohol, ya know?"

I bit back a sharp retort, and handed him my driver's licence, knowing that if I said anything I would probably get kicked out. He nodded and handed it back, pointing towards the redhead. "Just go see my brother," he said. "He'll serve you, yo." I nodded and considered telling him I just wanted to go home, but then shrugged. What the hell. Never look a gift horse in the mouth, right?

He was cleaning the counters when I got there. The stuff he was using looked foul, and smelled worse, but I figured that as long as it actually got the germs and dirt off it wouldn't kill me to be around it, although it did smell horribly like gym socks and air freshener had given birth. He wasn't smiling at all, rather looking as though he'd swallowed a lemon whole.

I cleared my throat behind him loudly, and he whirled around, smirking as soon as he saw me. "Hey, kid," he said. "Nice set you had there. What'll it be?"

I scowled- if there was one thing I couldn't stand, it was pet names, and being made fun of because of my size came a close second. "Beer, thanks. And don't call me 'kid'."

If it was possible, his smile became even wider, mocking me. "Are you sure you want a beer? You seem a little young for that. How about kiddie liquor instead? That seems more up your alley..."

"Enough with the kid jokes already! Jesus fucking Christ, I'm twenty!"

I could tell he didn't believe me. His eyebrows were raised in doubt as he looked me up and down, appraising me, judging me, and I barely kept myself for either punching him in the face or kissing him senseless- I wasn't sure which.

"Sure, kid," he said, handing me my beer, which smelled suspiciously like cat piss, and going back to his mindless wiping down of the counters. "Pull the other one."

I growled, taking out my ID for the second time that night and pushing it his way. "Take a look, then."

I waited as he twisted it and turned it in the dim light, evidently not finding it a fake. I felt insulted, and was seriously considering leaving, but the beer in my hands said differently.

"Rude passed this? This is legit?" he asked incredulously.

"_Yes. _For fuck's sake. _I'm_ _telling the truth!"_

"Yeah, yeah, babycakes. Nice name, by the way. Haven't heard that one before." He was definitely mocking me. I felt like I was breaking out in hives from all these pet names, and he was just standing there in his perfectness, _fucking mocking me_.

"It's a family name," I growled angrily, pissed off as hell. "On my mother's side. What's your's, then? You know mine, it's only fair. And stop with the weird nicknames, it's getting on my nerves."

He started wiping glasses, and turned to serve another customer before answering. "Name's Axel. A-X-E-L. Got it memorised?"

"Axel, huh? Sounds about as fake as that hair of yours." I thought that was a pretty good comeback, although it wasn't up to my normal standards. _He_, on the other hand, never faltered, running his hair through his wild mane.

"That's 'cause it is. All natural, Blondie-"

"_Roxas_."

"-Roxy. No shit."

I snorted derisively. "You've gotta be kidding me. That is the fakest hair colour I've seen in my life. And my brother's boyfriend's hair is fucking _silver_."

I thought about Riku, wondering if Sora had called him and asked him over yet, in my absence. Those two were inseparable, had been ever since we were children, and I was sure that he would be there, helping traumatise Nami forevermore.

He smiled at that, and I wasn't quite sure why. "I'm telling you, Roxy, it's all natural. I can prove it, too." He lifted the edge of his shirt slightly, and I could see a slight trail of bright red hair leading down into his shorts. I flapped my hand furiously at him, not wanting to see more in my current state of _extremely fucking attracted to this Axel person_. "Jeez, okay! I get it, it's natural! You don't have to bloody _strip_!"

He grinned, letting go of the cloth. "Glad we could straighten that out, then. If you really want proof, though, my brother got cursed with it too. Reno, ya know? You met him, I'm sure. Yup, this is as natural as it comes."

"Glad to know. Can I get another?" I waved his empty glass in his face, not really knowing why, since I hadn't wanted to stay. Axel plucked it out of my hands, refilling it quietly, then handing it back to me and saying, "Don't drink too much, Blondie. You might have to sleep it off here, and we don't want that, do we?"

"I'm not going to- for Christ's sake! Why does everyone assume that because I look like I'm twelve I'm a fucking lightweight? It's only my second one! I'm twenty, goddamnit! I should be able to get a goddamn drink without every man and his dog getting up in my face for every bloody drink I have! Jesus Christ! Lord knows when this will fucking stop and I've had it up to here! Goddamn. God fucking damn."

This really annoyed me, all of this. The fact that I couldn't stop talking with him, the fact that he was the most infuriating person I'd ever met, all of it. His nicknames, the way he smirked- there was no other word for the way he looked at me, it was a _smirk_- the fact that he was treating me as if I was five. I had just had enough.

He was just staring, plain old staring after that one. "That was a lot of swearing and blasphemy for one pint-size, Blondie. I hope you're not religious, because I have an inkling that The Lord Above is not going to like that."

"Shut your goddamn mouth," I said stonily, looking into my drink, defending my anger-fuelled actions. I swallowed it in a couple of gulps, as quick as i could, and he rolled his eyes.

"_Axel_!" the Reno dude yelled from the other side of the room. "Get your ass over here, stat, yo! We've got a live one!"

He left at that, and I tuned out, not bothering with another drink, the other bartender leaving me to my own thoughts. There wasn't much to my thoughts, though, and I found myself mostly missing Axel.

I heard the conversation from next to me, and looked up, surprised, to see that Axel was back.

But then came the word.

_The Organisation._

I saw red, as soon as I heard it. It had been a taboo ever since Sora's accident _because_ of Sora's accident. As soon as the police had finished with us, had left us alone, that whole thing had been over, in our house. Sora had been fine with Riku, and for Nami and I they left it alone. I had picked fights with so many people over it at that point that it wasn't talked about at school or anywhere else, and the Organisation had skipped town months before.

"So, the Organisation, huh?" I said morosely, watching as he turned around. His eyes alighted on the beer that Luxord- the other bartender- had left in front of me, and whatever girl he'd been talking to had huffed off.

"Blondie," he grinned. "You missed me!"

"I should be angrier, you know. That you were with them. They messed up my brother pretty bad, once. But I'm not. I don't know why."

And I wasn't, at that. The anger I felt was nothing, _nothing_ to what I had been feeling at the time. This wasn't anger, it was a dull ache, and burning that wasn't urgent.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked, seemingly concerned.

"Not really. Sora's... Well, he's okay now, and there's no point in opening old wounds. But, I dunno... It just seems wrong. That I'm not angry at you for it."

I remembered the crash with alarming clarity. I hadn't been there, personally, but I knew the story, knew the aftermath so well, that it seemed like it at times, especially times like those. I knew how he'd drifted, drunk, into the other lane. I knew how he'd crashed into a businessman rushing to the airport.

I knew how he'd been led into it by the Organisation.

"Get angry at me, then. Roxas, we met two hours ago, and we're probably never going to see each other after this night."

_No matter how much I would like that,_ I thought.

"I can't. I've been angry for so long... I punched Riku in the face, you know, when I heard that Sora was in hospital. I blamed him for everything."

I had done that at school, when I'd seen him first. He hadn't even known, but we'd both managed to practically mutilate each other before I'd been pulled off him by Hayner.

"Riku?"

"Sora's boyfriend."

"Oh." He started back where he'd left off, cleaning the glasses again.

"I knew you were an ass, when I first saw you. How could you not be? You're just so gorgeous, and cute-" That was true, hadn't I thought it? And all guys that I'd hooked up with had turned out to be dicks. The only difference yet was that I hadn't hooked up with him yet, and that- well, where this was heading with me that would be gone soon, too.

"Whoa, _hold the phone_, Blondie. I'm not _cute, _got it memorised? I'm manly, yes. Gorgeous, yes- you get points for that one. You can call me beautiful, I won't complain. But _cute_? Fucking _cute_? I'm not cute, Blondie. I am a _manly man_. We _manly men_ are not _cute_. How many drinks have you had?"

Why did he keep saying _'got it memorised'? _He'd said it at least twice by then. I looked back up at him angrily, saying, "That's not the point, Red."

"Red?!"

He sounded so insulted that it was satisfying, knowing that this was going to be my revenge. "You call me Blondie, I call you Red. Do unto others, blah blah blah. But the thing is- it doesn't surprise me anymore, hot guys being assholes. It's just a fact of my life. Hot guys are assholes. Nice guys are straight. Hot gay nice guys are taken by hot gay assholes."

"C'est la vie, I guess."

_That's life_- how true it was, for me.

"Yeah. I guess. But you... I knew it. I think I already said that. But that's it. As soon as I saw you, I knew it would happen. I would fucking fall in love with you and you would fucking break my fucking heart. I just didn't expect it to happen so goddamn soon."

"Jesus, Blondie. Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?"

Too many swear words, then.

"I don't think you get the point of this, Axel. _I can't get angry at you_. You were part of the gang that caused my brother to be in a coma for eight fucking months, and I'm _not angry_."

He looked away from me, ashamed. "That kid was your brother, huh?"

I looked up at him as quick as I could. "You were there?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I was."

"Well?" I wanted to know. God help me, I wanted to know _so fucking much_. I wanted to put this to rest, to finally know why my brother had woken up eight months aft leaving home one night, with no memory of the past year.

"It was a shit of a party, ya know? Booze, girls, guys... The whole shebang. We were wasted, off our faces. I can't remember that much from it. I do remember your brother, though. Brown hair? Blue eyes like fucking searchlights? Yeah. Couldn't forget his face.

"He was pretty, I guess, if you're into the whole innocence thing. He'd hung out with us a couple of times before, and he never _got _anything, none of the jokes or innuendos. I didn't like him at all in _that_ way, he was just like a kid brother. One that you got shitfaced with.

"That night Vexen kept giving him more to drink, and the kid... Sora... he just went along with it. And the next morning he was gone, and Xemnas was telling us we had to go, leave, before the cops got there. Xehanort had just kicked the bucket, and the police were cracking down... and then out of the blue, the kid had gone and crashed his car, and it was all our fault. I couldn't stand that guilt... I had to get out of there. I stood up to Xemnas, and got the shit knocked out of me by his guard dogs.

"Reno gave me a job, afterwards. And I guess I just thought that I'd never have to face that part of my life again. I was wrong. _It _was wrong. The whole thing was just so fucked up."

That had been the entire basis of my life for so long. _It was fucked up._ "Yeah, well, it was even more fucked up on my end, believe me. My brother was in hospital for months, not able to wake up or do anything... And I wanted you dead. I didn't even know who you were, and I wanted you dead, you and your friends."

"You're talkative when you're drunk, you know that, Blondie?"

I wasn't drunk at all, but I let him believe that.

"I ask myself why I'm not angry with you, and you know what my brain comes up with? I'm _attracted_ to you. You're _attractive_. I'm- you need to stop being attractive. Right now. Go." It made no sense, but if he could do that- everything would finally be better, and I wouldn't break my heart by sleeping with this gorgeous, maneater of a guy whose smirk had already captured my fragile, traitorous heart.

"Blondie, the world doesn't work that way."

I rolled my eyes, grabbing his shirt. I couldn't stop myself, even if it was a mistake."Maybe if I do this, it'll go away."

I kissed him then, feeling his lips- harder than a woman's, but softer than I expected. He moaned a little, though I knew he would never admit it, and I smirked as he whispered against my mouth, "Blondie. You're not drunk."

"Never said I was, did I?"

I pulled him closer to me, and internally laughed as he gasped in soft surprise against my mouth, allowing my tongue entrance to his mouth, which I gladly took. I had to stop myself from tugging on his hair, but I knew that if I did there would be no going back, and I didn't want to hurt myself or him, but then he moaned again and I was gone. He wasn't moving except to kiss me, until he broke the kiss and softly whispered, "I'll just go sign out."

Axel was gone, and I had a choice to make. I could stay, and inevitably end up in his bed, or I could leave home, to Sora and Riku and a traumatised Naminé. I sighed and nearly put my head on the counter. It was never a choice, really. I was going home with Axel, or he was going home with me, whichever. I wasn't picky.

He practically ran out from the back room, his eyes lighting up when he saw I was still there. "Now... Where were we?"

I rolled my eyes _yet again_, and started snogging him as hard as I could, when he lifted my hips up to get better access to my mouth. I automatically wrapped my legs around him, and tentatively licked and nibbled on his lip, when he licked the edge of my mouth and managed to get his tongue in my mouth.

I moaned, straight away. It rose unbidden from the back of my throat as he brought my tongue out to dance,and my hands went up to play with his hair, his fiery mane, tugging on the strands, and he gasped out my name, my real name this time. _"Roxas."_

I broke the kiss and looked at him, still panting slightly. "Your place or mine?" I asked roughly.

"Where do you live?"

"Hickory Street."

"That's too far away. Mine."

He pulled me out of the door and into some sort of rust bucket, a monster that could no more be called a car than Sora could be called a man. Technically, it _was _one, but only technically. Every so often, in the car, he would stop, and pull me over to kiss me senseless, and I almost jumped his bones- I would've, but his car was horrible, and I didn't want to do anything unspeakable in it. It was slow, though, and I was really impatient but the time we arrived at his apartment,

"Your car is horrible, Axel," I said, wincing as I unthinkingly slammed the door, and waited for it to fall off. Thankfully it didn't, and I breathed a silent sigh of relief. "How can you stand it?"

"I'm on a barkeep's salary, Roxas, I can't afford better."

"Why are you a barkeeper, then? Why didn't you go to college, or something like that? You're smart, Axel, I can tell that already."

"Money's tight. I can't afford the tuition, and anyway, I doubt I would get into any college worth going to. My school scores in my senior year were shit, I was hanging out with the Organisation... I have a bad record."

"So retake the exams. Try and get yourself a scholarship, maybe. Student loans are available as well, Axel, and you can get a day job, maybe. I can't dictate what you do, but just... think about it, really."

"I don't know, Blondie, I really don't. Just... leave it, alright?"

"Yeah, alright," I said,and I opened the door with one hand, while pulling him in by the shirt with my other. This tipped off my balance, and I ended up tugging us down to the kitchen floor, pulling at clothes and kissing as if our lives depended on it. I bit down on his neck, kissing and sucking to create a mark, and then kissed up his jaw. "Not here," he gasped, and I smiled as I got a reaction from him and his dick. "Fuck, Roxas... not here."

We barely made it to the bedroom.

* * *

I woke up before Axel the next morning, and sat up in a state of panic. What had I been thinking? I'd left Nami and Sora home alone, while also going home with and fucking a random stranger. I'd even considered taking _him _home with _me_, which was a travesty in itself. I couldn't imagine Axel meeting my brother or my sister. I couldn't imagine him as a real part of my life. He was amazing, beautiful, wonderful, but I just couldn't imagine him anywhere near my family or my friends. We were both so different.

I crept of of the bed, untangling his arms from around me. He groaned a little and turned over, and I quickly got out of the room before my self-control failed and I woke him up for another round.

_Fuck_, but his chest was toned.

I picked up my various items of clothing, pulling them over my head. I wrote a quick note to him- _Sorry_- and got the hell out of there, trudging back to the bar and to my car, and driving home.

As soon as I opened the door I was attacked by Naminé, who immediately started talking. "Roxas! Where were you? You didn't come home last night, and Sora had Riku over and they started getting freaky _right in front of me_, and who wants to see that from their older brother? Roxas, you'd better not ever do that in front of me, or I swear I'll butcher you. I'm young and impressionable! I don't need that!"

I peeled her off me and laughed. "Hey, Nami. Sorry. I was at a friend's house. Why don't you tell Sora off, you're plenty good at that. Umm... I promise never to almost have sex in front of you? And don't you have school?"

"Don't be silly, Roxas, it's Saturday. Next time there's school on Saturday, I'll tell you."

"Nami, it's Thursday."

"... Dammit..."

"I'll write you a note. Go get your uniform on." She walked off and I sighed. At least with her out of the house I could maybe forget about what had happened last night.

"Roxas!"

Or not.

I turned around, plastering a smile on my face. "So, I heard you had Riku over last night, Sora. Finally got laid, huh?"

He grinned, reaching up to ruffle my hair, which was sticking up in odd ways, seeing as it still had gel in it from yesterday and I'd slept and done other stuff with it in. "You're one to talk. What were _you_ doing last night?"

"I asked first."

"I've been getting laid for the past three years, I'm more interested in you."

He sat down on the couch, and crossed his legs, obviously not leaving until I told him what had happened last night. I just walked right past him into the kitchen, where Riku was sitting eating cornflakes.

"So I heard you got laid," he said conversationally.

"Not you too."

"C'mon! How long has it been? A year? Two?"

"One and a half, not that I'm counting. And let's go to the subject of you and my brother fornicating in front of my sixteen year old sister last night. I like that subject."

"Oh, no. You're not getting out of this one. My love life is not interesting. My love life has been exactly the same for three years. Your love life, on the other hand..."

"Yes, we get it. My love life is a sad trail of horror, and no, this is not an exception. And so I don't want to talk about it."

"Give us a clue, though. What's her name?"

I got out the instant coffee from the cupboard, and put water on to boil, and turned back around to face Riku with my eyebrow raised. "I'm not telling you."

Sora was sitting on his lap, now, and was eating his cereal. Riku wasn't bothered by this, though, if only because he was more interested in me. "Is it even a girl?"

Sora spat out Riku's cornflakes, and I looked down into the cup in which I was mixing vile brown powder, sugar, milk, and water, refusing to meet his eyes.

A slow smile rose onto his face. "So it's a _guy_... Pray, do tell."

I sipped my coffee and grimaced at the taste. "No."

Sora looked at me with wide eyes. "It's a _guy_? But the last time you went out with a guy was..."

"Two years ago, yes. I know. I'm also not really sure what I was thinking, but that's not relevant."

"_Hell yes it's relevant. _I've never heard something _more _relevant. What was his name? What did he look like? Did you top or bottom?"

"_Really? _Of all the things you could want to know, you choose _that_? Why couldn't I have a _normal _brother, who stays the hell out of this kind of stuff and doesn't want to know every detail of my life?"

Naminé poked her head through the door. "There. I have my uniform on. Are you sure I have to go to school?"

"_Yes,_" I said, relieved that she was taking the heat off me. "Let's go."

As I walked out, I heard one of my two interrogators call out, "_this is not over!"_

* * *

Hayner and I have been friends for years. We're a bit like Riku and Sora, except that we aren't in love and have no attraction to each other whatsoever. But he and I have stuck together for as long as I can remember, and that day was no exception.

"So, I heard from the lovebirds that you got laid last night. By a _guy_. Dude, finally. Maybe you won't be so uptight anymore."

"Shut up."

"Or not. So, I don't want to know all the details of your sordid love life, but I just wanted to say, well done. I really didn't think your ugly mug could pull it off."

"Thanks so much, Hayner. I really appreciate that." I said sarcastically.

"That's what friends are for, man. But, no, really, don't tell me anything."

"You want me to tell you, don't you?"

"Please."

"What do you want to know?"

"What's his name?"

"Axel."

"What's he look like?"

"Not telling."

"Did you top or bottom?"

"Hayner. No."

"C'mon, man, give me something. Uh... What does he do?"

"Bartender."

He rolled his eyes, and we trudged through the snow to class. It was nothing special, the class we were going to- just Chemistry, which I was taking for no particular reason other than it interested me. I was actually going for my Psychology degree, which didn't seem to be working well for me seeing as I couldn't even work out why _I_ did what I did. Hayner, on the other hand, was going into the army, and they were paying for his tuition. He was taking chemistry because he liked to blow things up.

I don't exactly remember how it happened after then, but somehow Hayner ended up on the ground, and I stood, laughing, over him. "Are you all right?" I asked through my laughter.

"Yeah, yeah, let's all laugh at the klutz," he said grumpily, brushing snow off his jacket.

"Serves you right for asking awkward questions."

"I still want to know whether you bottomed or not, though. That could be ammunition forever."

"Which is one of the reasons I'm not telling you."

He laughed at that, but wouldn't stop badgering me all the way to class.

In class, the professor kept looking over at us. I don't know why to this day, but I think it may have been because Hayner kept poking me with a stirring rod.

After class, the professor asked to see him, and I patted him on the back and left with a joking, "you're in _trouble_..."

He came out after a few minutes with a bewildered grin on his face, making him look even more gormless than usual. "I've been bumped up," he said, detached. "I've been bumped up to Advanced Chem."

"Well done," I said. I was a little jealous of him, but not much; it wasn't as if Advanced Chem was a requirement for a shrink, after all.

"What're you going to do in class, though? I mean, I'm not going to be there anymore, and face, you don't really pay attention, do you?"

"I do so. But I'll probably drop it... There's really no point. It's just a waste of time and money."

"If you say so. Come on, I want to go get some coffee. I'm really tired."

"You can't talk. You know what I was doing all last night?"

"I thought you didn't want to tell me."

"I've changed my mind. Maybe it'll scar you so much that you'll leave me alone forevermore."

"Fat chance."

"You'll see. You'll see."

* * *

I was sitting at the table, studying for my exams, when Hayner came rushing in. "So... You'll never guess who turned up in Advanced Chem today."

"Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?"

"How'd you know?"

"Lucky guess." I sipped my craptastic sludge and turned back to the piles of paper in front of me.

"No, but seriously. I think you might know him."

"Might I?"

"Tall, freakish red hair, tattoos under his eyes, used to be a bartender... Goes by the name of Axel... Sound familiar?"

"Everything except the tattoos point to the man I hooked up with a couple of months ago. Your point?"

"You need to get laid again."

"No, I really don't."

"You need to get laid again _with him_."

"Go away."

"You need to have a _relationship _with him."

"Fuck off."

"You need to get married to him and bear his red-haired children."

"Not physically possible. Do you need another anatomy lesson?"

"You need to have a budding romance with chocolates and roses, _with him_."

"Is this ever going to stop?"

"Yes. I'm done now, I can't think of anything else."

_"Good."_

He sat down on the chair next to me, and said, "oh, by the way, I invited him over."

I spat out my drink. "You did _what_?"

"I invited him over here. To your house."

I stood up, and looked for my jacket. "Right. I'm gone."

He draped himself across my furniture. "I think he just pulled up outside your door, I wouldn't if I were you."

I stopped, and changed tack, heading for the bedroom to hide. I heard a knock on the door, and Hayner answer. I heard Axel cross the doorstep, and Hayner explaining that it wasn't his house so Axel didn't have to take off his shoes, and I heard Axel take off his shoes anyway.

I heard Hayner tell Axel that he was just going to fetch something, and then I hid in the wardrobe.

"You have to come out."

"I refuse."

"C'mon, Roxas."

"Fuck _off_."

"I'll get him to get you. I'll tell him that this is your house."

"Please don't."

I could almost hear him smirking. "Then _come out of the closet_."

"No."

I could hear footsteps, and then Axel's voice. "Who's in the closet?"

Hayner sounded exasperated. "Roxas, please get out."

I heard an intake of breath, and the the wardrobe door was tugged open, and his face was smirking down at me. "Blondie. I didn't know you were in the closet."

Hayner was right, he had gotten tattoos. Other than that, he looked exactly the same, exactly as god-like and intimidating and sexy as before.

"Stop fucking calling me Blondie!" It was the only thing I could think of to say. "Or Roxy. You're not allowed to call me that, either."

"That's fine with me, kid."

"Or kid."

"What do you want me to call you, then?"

"I don't. Go away."

Hayner pulled me out of the wardrobe. "I'm leaving now. Don't take too long, I think Naminé's going to be home soon."

"Naminé?" asked Axel.

"My little sister. She's sixteen."

"Oh."

"Well, this is awkward," I mused.

"It doesn't have to be," he said.

"Yes, it does."

He turned to me, and said softly, "why'd you leave?"

"Does it matter?"

"Hell yes. I really liked you, y'know? And then you were gone, after the best fucking night I'd ever had. How d'you think that made me feel?"

I had two choices at that point: either I could do as he just asked and psychoanalyse him, or I could ignore that question, and him.

"You can't ignore me forever," was his response to my resultant action.

"Yes I can."

"No, you can't. Look, I'm just going to come out and say it. I want a relationship with you, okay? I have since we... you know..."

"You can say it. _Had sex_."

"Had _fucking awesome _sex and then you _disappeared_ on me, I think is what you mean."

"Why do you want a relationship?"

"Because you're hot, mostly, and a great lay. I don't really know you well enough to base it on anything else. But I do think I'm in love with you, which I know is creepy but it's true."

"So your supposed love is entirely based on physical attraction?"

"Pretty much."

"You know, where I come from, they call that lust."

He kissed me then, and I almost kissed him back, except I didn't want a repeat performance of the other night.

"No. I will not date you."

"You sure about that?" He did it again, this time pressing me up against the wall, thrusting his tongue in my mouth , and I moaned completely against my will. I wrapped my hands in his hair again- _god, how I fucking loved that hair_- and brought my legs up to hook around his waist. "_This proves nothing,_" I hissed between kisses, but he just smirked, and whispered back, "_like hell it doesn't._"

"Aww, that's so _cute_," came an excited squeal from behind us.

I climbed off him to face my little sister who had evidently come home while I was _busy_, but she was more preoccupied with Axel.

"What's your name?"

"Axel... Axel Flurry."

"You sound like an ice cream."

"Shut up."

"What are your intentions with my brother?"

"Oh, we're dating."

I felt the need to cut in there. "No, we're not."

He smirked. "He's lying. We are."

"Liar."

"What are you, five?"

"Better than the three year old that you obviously are channelling."

"Real mature, Roxy, real mature."

Naminé looked seriously at him. "How much do you plan to give us in dowry?"

"What do you want?"

"A cow and five magic beans."

"Done." They shook on it, and I stood there with my mouth hanging open. "You did not just promise her a dowry."

"I did. You belong to me now."

"No. I don't."

He looked over at Naminé. "Does he?"

"No. This is just my price for allowing you two to marry. He actually has to agree first."

"Dammit. Okay. New plan. Roxas, will you please go out with me?"

"I've already answered that question."

"Yes?"

"No."

"Oh, come _on,_ Roxas," said Naminé. "Look at the poor guy. Just one date? For him _and _me?"

I rolled my eyes, and sighed. "_Fine_. Just one date. But _no _dowry. Absolutely not."

He practically launched himself at me, taking my lips and snogging me senseless. "You won't regret it."

"I'd _better _not."

* * *

[TEN YEARS LATER]

"Axel," I yelled, running through the house. "Are you and the kids ready yet? We need to go!"

He poked his head through the living room door. "Do you know where Riley's socks are? She can't find them. Oh, and Matthew's refusing to go, something about not wanting to see Kairi again."

"Her socks are on top of the radiator. I'll speak to Matthew."

I walked through into Matt's room, sitting down next to him on his bed. "What's wrong?"

"Don't want to see Kairi. She scares me."

"She scares the rest of us too, mate. But think about it! Riley will be there to protect you, and Aunt Nami will be there, and Uncle Sora, and so will Siobhan and Liam."

"Liam said he'd beat me up."

"Liam's full of shit. Riley would beat him any day of the week, especially if he laid a finger on you."

"Are you sure, Papa?"

"Yeah. I promise. Oh, and Uncle Riku and Uncle Sora have the new baby, remember? You need to be there for that, she was just adopted the other day, this'll be the first time any of us will see her."

"I guess you're right."

"C'mon, we've gotta go." I ruffled his brown hair, and looking into his eyes. They were bright blue, like mine, and I was suddenly glad that we'd gone with donors for our kids instead of just adopting. Matthew had my genes, and looked sort of like me, although he did have brown hair like his mother. He was five years old, and eternally frightened of his Aunt Kairi, who was Axel's half-sister.

Riley, on the other hand, was Axel's daughter through and through, with bright red hair and piercing green eyes, and a shitload of attitude for a seven-year-old. She wasn't afraid of anyone, not even Sora's bully of a ten-year-old, Liam.

"Are you two ready?" asked Axel, with Riley by his side.

"Yup," I said, picking up Matthew and walking out the door. I kissed Axel on the cheek, and then on the mouth as he pulled me in for a proper kiss.

"You're not getting away that easily," he growled, and I laughed, and went to buckle the kids into the car.

Life was good.

* * *

**A/N: Aaand it's done.**

**Thanks to all who followed this story, or reviewed, or anything else, really. I appreciate it like I appreciate when people give me chocolate :)**

**I want to address a few things here.**

**First to both Roxas's and Hayner's OOCness- I'm sorry about that. I made Roxas PMS a bit too much and Hayner too smart (how the fuck did you sneak into Advanced Chem? Did you drink the brain juice or something?). In my defense, they were both needed for the story, and most of the swearing was written at three in the morning.**

**Virtual cookies for all who read this!**

**Karma Out.**


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